I was in my previous job for 8 years and the one before that, a year. However, the thing that I am learning about being self employed is that change is a regular occurrence. Before, change scared me and I have spent the last year on edge thinking that when contracts aren’t renewed, it is something that I have done, that I am not good enough and that I am plain useless and cant do this!
I have had one main client now for a year and that contract is coming to an end for no negative reason. The company has grown and need someone there full time. This is not for me. When I was first told, I was sad, scared and started to be bloody hard on myself. However, I realised – hang fire, this could be the start of something amazing.
And you know what?…I was right. It made me go out and network. It made me get out of my comfort zone and do the things I have been putting back.
I, finally, started to set up my mental health project, My Discombobulated Brain. I started to reach out to people that I wanted to work with. People who or whose product I believe in. The reason behind this is that it is way easier to be a part of something if it excites you. If it gets you right there in the gut.
Now I am not, by any stretch, saying that the work I don with my longest running client doesn’t excite me – it really does. I mean, I am SO BLOODY HAPPY that they have grown, had their investment and need someone full time. I feel that is a huge part of what I do and it appeals a lot to the mumma side of me – the nurturing development of it.
I am a completely different person to who I was when I started with them and that is down, a lot, to them. They built me up, stood by me and picked me up, sometimes literally! I have made some life long friends whom I will never be able to pay what they have done for me back.
The key thing that I am learning is change is good. yes the battle of the finances is a graft but you know what…it is worth it, every darn second!
Also I got to quote the late, great Bowie for the title so to make you smile here is his video for, ‘Changes.’